Impossible NOT to Care.

::: Anon. ::: says:

where you going?

Nur Azhani says:

nowhere.

::: :: Anon::: says:

and??...

::: Anon ::: says:

ohh abaikan kawan lar

Nur Azhani says:

saya tidak mahu menganggu

::: Anon::: says:

kamu tidak mengganggu

::: Anon::: says:

im damn hungry sial

::: Anon::: says:

come go mamak now

Nur Azhani says:

haiya look at the time fool

::: Anon ::: says:

i forgot..you got curfew..heh!

Nur Azhani says:

Smarty

Nur Azhani says:

may chong asked kalli did u call him

Nur Azhani says:

Ahah

::: Anon::: says:

why you need his num anyway

Nur Azhani says:

nak ajak dating

::: Anon ::: says:

ohh really

::: Anon ::: says:

hey..can you take me seriously for once

::: Anon::: says:

Ishh

Nur Azhani says:

y so curious

::: Anon::: says:

im not ler...but treat me seriously sometimes also ler..im playful but sometimes must be serious also..ok?

Nur Azhani says:

are u having ur pms

::: Anon::: says:

no lar..just a lil moody today

::: Anon::: says:

dont know why

Nur Azhani says:

Sorry

Nur Azhani says:
won't add to it

::: Anon::: says:

haiyo..you're not ler

::: Anon ::: says:

bile mau keluar?

Nur Azhani says:

READ

::: Anon ::: says:

im assuming its his blog?

Nur Azhani says:

Yep

::: Anon::: says:

i dont like the paramore kata-kata

::: Anon::: says:

very rude

Nur Azhani says:

a whore?

Nur Azhani says:

r u kidding me

::: Anon::: says:

Yea

::: Anon ::: says:

i hope he's not referring to anyone

Nur Azhani says:

aha right

::: Anon::: says:

wait let me read ok

::: Anon::: says:

his english is good

::: Anon ::: says:

better than mine

Nur Azhani says:

get real

::: Anon::: says:

serious shit man

::: Anon::: says:

very powerful vocabs

Nur Azhani says:

he just like to use big words tht dont fit

Nur Azhani says:

all the time

Nur Azhani says:

i don't know if that's learning or showing off

::: Anon ::: says:

he used variety of words..unlike mine..limited

Nur Azhani says:

haha yea “keepen”.

::: Anon ::: says:

hahah shut up

Nur Azhani says:

will tomorrow b good for teh tarik

Nur Azhani says:

but syaz n syukee won't b here

::: Anon::: says:

he refers to you as Mas is it

::: Anon ::: says:

tanak..i wanna go out with syaz and syuk also

Nur Azhani says:

no that's his friend from college

Nur Azhani says:

then u ask them

:: Anon:::: says:

shhh...im suddenly so intrigue by his blog

::: Anon::: says:

he looks seriously weird

::: Anon::: says:

its like some kinda big size rat

Nur Azhani says:

what do u mean

::: Anon::: says:

i mean his nose lar

Nur Azhani says:

y would u look at someone's nose like tht

::: Anon::: says:

nothing nothing..ahaha...he's cute..to the eyes of the beholder

Nur Azhani says:

Ew

Nur Azhani says:

something is wrong with u

::: Anon::: says:

what do you see in him

::: Anon::: says:

is he cute/hot/gorgeous/hunky to you

::: Anon::: says:

Ahaha

Nur Azhani says:

no. it's beyond looks u fool

Nur Azhani says:

i'm not like u, not everyone is

::: Anon::: says:

ohh i think im having the same thing as him

::: Anon::: says:

blocked nose

Nur Azhani says:

at least something in common

Nur Azhani says:

go get married or something

::: Anon::: says:

I woke up early this morning with shocking news; my every artworks and sweats were sitting in front of my house gate while I was asleep. I cant sleep again after that. There’s a saying Peyton used to draw with a black and red background (to any of one tree hill fans), with a bloody font saying “people always leave

Nur Azhani says:

it's him who left

Nur Azhani says:

i return but not throw them

Nur Azhani says:

get ur facts right.

::: Anon::: says:

since when i said you threw

Nur Azhani says:

him not u

::: Anon ::: says:

Due to that, I dropped a subject which is computer organization and architecture. I couldn’t get my mind straight and next week is the test and I cant afford to fail anymore.

::: Anon::: says:

wow...he's putting it on you isn't it

Nur Azhani says:

all the time.

:::: Anon:: says:

lol..sighh

::: Anon::: says:

syiok la main blog

::: : Anon:: says:

maybe i should start my own blog

Nur Azhani says:

make one

:::: Anon:: says:

but im not good in editing pictures

::: Anon::: says:

uploading, linking sites

Nur Azhani says:

y edit

Nur Azhani says:

no, they have a special application for tht

Nur Azhani says:

it's part of the package

::: Anon ::: says:

no no..i mean like if you go on myspace..those malay girls and guys..the edit pics to black and white, fade out

::: Anon::: says:

all the effects in the world..damn good lar...i dont know how to do that

Nur Azhani says:

y would u want to edit them

::: Anon::: says:

coz its nice to edit them..it brings out creativity

Nur Azhani says:

Haiya

Nur Azhani says:

it depends on what do u want to put at ur blog

Nur Azhani says:

be it pics or words

Nur Azhani says:

up to u.

::: Anon::: says:

both

::: Anon::: says:

do you have any software to do editing of pictures

Nur Azhani says:

not right now

Nur Azhani says:

Sorry

::: Anon::: says:

Okayz

::: Anon::: says:

lets see whats the update in your blog

::: Anon::: says:

wei whatever is it..if we fight or whatever dont return stuff and shit ok

::: Anon::: says:

ahahah..puh-lease

::: Anon ::: says:

dont memalukan me ok?

Nur Azhani says:

it's not d same wit u

Nur Azhani says:

ur not tht special

Nur Azhani says:

memalukan in what sense

::: Anon::: says:

i might be one day

Nur Azhani says:

be what

::: Anon::: says:

that "special"

Nur Azhani says:

dream on silly

Nur Azhani says:

so memalukan in what sense

::: Anon::: says:

memalukan lar..like reject kao kao

Nur Azhani says:

how so

::: Anon::: says:

like hurmm...its like trying to say "look, i dont wana have anymore connection with you, heres your things...now fuck off"

Nur Azhani says:

haha hell no

Nur Azhani says:

what would u do if u were me

::: Anon::: says:

if i were you?? what do i do to him?

Nur Azhani says:

er sure

:::: Anon:: says:

ill just call him and i scold him kao kao..say everything i wanna say

::: Anon ::: says:

words strikes deeper than actions

Nur Azhani says:

yea? what would i say

Nur Azhani says:

u say

::: Anon::: says:

i would say "you immature piece of fuck...why the fuck do you keep controlling me when i dont even belong to you...we're just friends, get it that way...i do like you, i do have feelings for you but i just dont wanna commit right now...why cant you get it..and who the fuck are you to tell me who i should mix with...how the fuck does mixing with them affect my relationship with you

Nur Azhani says:

wow. ur one angry soul

::: Anon::: says:

you're selfish, ignorant and inconsiderate for the reason that you dont bloody give me my space...

::: Anon::: says:

and you do know that we're best buddies..and i always treat you as one..you WILL NEVER EVER lose your spot but why the fuck are you being so damn insecure for

::: Anon::: says:

(omg..you better stop me before i continue and continue and continue..ahahha)

Nur Azhani says:

i'm curious

::: Anon::: says:

and ill say this

::: Anon::: says:

"you always blame me for the fact that our friendship is in jeapordy but do you realize that you are actually pushing this friendship away? its you who are being so hard that force me be this way, and its not because i want to..its because i just cannot tahan anymore..

::: Anon::: says:

just fucking grow up and when you're out from your nutshell just let me know because i'll still be right here..and that is what friends do..and dont say that i leave because i never leave a friend!

Nur Azhani says:

Damn

Nur Azhani says:

how could u say all tht.

Nur Azhani says:

i mean how do u know that's exactly how i feel but have problems letting out

Nur Azhani says:

if i'd say those things u said, i'd burst out in tears

Nur Azhani says:

r u dead or what

::: Anon::: says:

no seriously

::: Anon ::: says:

is that exactly how you feel?

::: Anon::: says:

is that how you feel?

Nur Azhani says:

somewhat yea.

Nur Azhani says:

am i tht easy to read

::: Anon::: says:

no but lets just say that im always putting myself in a persons shoe and thats why i know how you feel

::: Anon::: says:

from the way you talk to me..from the way you describe things, i kinda figured these things ler

::: Anon::: says:

now save the history ok?

Nur Azhani says:

cewah. what history

::: Anon::: says:

ahah..no ler..to me you harbour lotsa shit like this already

::: Anon::: says:

and i say its high time to be frank to him you know..let him know your frustration

::: : Anon:: says:

and at the same time..you listen to what he has to say

Nur Azhani says:

when do i not listen. i listen alright.

Nur Azhani says:

what shit

::: Anon::: says:

i know you do listen..and im just saying

::: Anon::: says:

now you get him to listen to you ler

Nur Azhani says:

right, mind u for not getting ur point

Nur Azhani says:

He wrote "I realised that a person can have a dark heart but still can say sweet things to others."

Nur Azhani says:

what the hell does tht mean.

::: Anon::: says:

he's trying to say ppl are being two faced?

Nur Azhani says:

s if he's a saint/not

Nur Azhani says:

y make me those stuff, if he wasn't a two faced

::: Anon::: says:

like i said..people vent anger, say things which they dont mean just to create some sort of attention and also to get you talking to them

Nur Azhani says:

so all his sweet words were fake too?

Nur Azhani says:

right, he could've called and ask to meet up or something.

::: Anon ::: says:

he is egoistic

::: Anon ::: says:

i know all this things lar honey pie

::: Anon::: says:

its cat and mouse game...nobody makes a move..

::: Anon ::: says:

but somehow you guys are deliberately sending signals to each other via blogs, personal message, shoutouts

Nur Azhani says:

cats and mouse, they run and chase

:::: Anon:: says:

(i should have been in psychology right?)

Nur Azhani says:

Hahaha

Nur Azhani says:

ur an ass.

::: Anon ::: says:

no lar...ive experience all this before and somehow im like that as well

::: Anon::: says:

to hurt my gf i say all hurtful things, post up all kinds of shit to get her attention

Nur Azhani says:

u too have/had a bf like him?

Nur Azhani says:

ah my bad.

::: Anon::: says:

and at the same time..my gf...she's like so quiet , not making move but you somehow know that theres a yearning to talk

::: Anon::: says:

thats why i said..be the mature one..

::: Anon::: says:

dont think of this as "ohh i win because you came to talk to me 1st"

Nur Azhani says:

but he's not ready to talk, he told me to leave him alone.

Nur Azhani says:

so let him focus with school.

Nur Azhani says:

i never thought of it tht way. winning.

::: Anon::: says:

says it out of anger! he says it to make you want him even more

::: Anon ::: says:

jual mahal lar

Nur Azhani says:

i don't get anything by winning/ otherwise

::: Anon ::: says:

to you no..but to him yes

::: Anon::: says:

thats why i said...you're the mature one..so make mature move...

Nur Azhani says:

make me want him even more, r u for real?

::: Anon::: says:

dont be so immature like him..if he keeps declining, keep insisting

::: Anon ::: says:

im damn serious..not want him lar..but you're like tak tahan you know..not talking to him..theres like a gap/hole in your life...too biasa already talking to him..and when the norm isnt there anymore you feel empty

::: Anon::: says:

feel like something is lost..

Nur Azhani says:

partly true.

::: Anon ::: says:

not "want" as in want him to be your boy boy or whatever..

Nur Azhani says:

just making myself clear la. cause u always thought of it tht way, want him s in WANT him, u know.

Nur Azhani says:

ur bloody silly jokes.

::: Anon::: says:

no no...but somehow i know deep down you, you stil llove him lar..you dont have to admit or deny or whatever

::: Anon ::: says:

i just know it...

::: Anon::: says:

but the reason you;re not with him is prolly you;re not being able to commit as yet

Nur Azhani says:

of course i love him, what idiot won't love his/her friend of 5 years

::: Anon::: says:

not as a friend..something more than that

:::: Anon:: says:

theres still an attachment there

Nur Azhani says:

i don't know.

::: Anon::: says:

sometimes its hard for one to realize it until someone comes along and just slap them and wake them up for them to realize

Nur Azhani says:

i'm just waiting for that someone to slap me. let it not b u

::: Anon::: says:

slap as in one hard knock and you'll realize what you want ler

Nur Azhani says:

i know what i want, i just don't know if i need it

::: Anon::: says:

ok then be honest with me ok?

::: Anon::: says:

what do you want..since you already know what you want

::: Anon::: says:

this is between me, you and msn lar

Nur Azhani says:

i want him to b my best friend for a long time, a lifetime if possible.

::: Anon::: says:

no one else knows ok? my promise to you, our secret..ok?

Nur Azhani says:

ok gay

::: Anon::: says:

but nothing more than that

Nur Azhani says:

i think so.

:::: Anon:: says:

dont think..be sure of your answer

::: Anon ::: says:

my point is..if you dont wanna be in a relationship with him..why force yourself to go into one with him when you know you cant commit

Nur Azhani says:

forcing? who is

::: Anon::: says:

and make him see that...make him see that you're unwilling to go into a relationship with him..and if you're in a relatioonship with him..its like you're forcing yourself to be with him

Nur Azhani says:

how is tht

::: Anon::: says:

how is that what?

Nur Azhani says:

how do u make ppl see things that they don't want to.

::: Anon ::: says:

i dont know..its hard lar i should say...it all comes down to the person himself

Nur Azhani says:

that's right. if he doesn't want to b friends, there's nothing much i can do. no?

::: Anon::: says:

but you wanna keep this friendship.no?

Nur Azhani says:

very much, i do.

Nur Azhani says:

he's a great friend.

::: Anon::: says:

then give it a shot lar

Nur Azhani says:

nothing will change unless he wants the same thing.

::: Anon::: says:

its like him trying to make you his girl, he gave it a shot, he gagal, so thats that

Nur Azhani says:

haiya, i did try, don't u remember. he turned me down all the way.

::: Anon ::: says:

keep insisting

Nur Azhani says:

that's different. why not b friends if u can't b something else

Nur Azhani says:

to him i think it's all or nothing. looks like it

::: Anon::: says:

then its his pasal lar...hes losing a great friend

Nur Azhani says:

yea, that's what going on now.

::: Anon ::: says:

yea so its his lost

::: Anon ::: says:

loss*

::: Anon::: says:

dnt think of it as you loss

Nur Azhani says:

not at all.

::: Anon::: says:

sorry for the late reply...went to get chachos..ahah..want some?

Nur Azhani says:

no thanks

::: Anon::: says:

so where were we..

::: Anon::: says:

ohh ya..so you gonna make a move?

Nur Azhani says:

India

Nur Azhani says:

no. maybe

::: Anon::: says:

stupid girl....what india india

Nur Azhani says:

where indicates a place

Nur Azhani says:

so y not india, jerk

::: Anon::: says:

but i know everytime you check your phone to see if theres message from him

::: Anon::: says:

or when theres message coming in your hoping its from him right?

Nur Azhani says:

not really,idiot

Nur Azhani says:

shut up or jump off a cliff or something.

::: Anon::: says:

why you asking me to jump off the cliff now..

::: Anon::: says:

Ishh

Nur Azhani says:

don't u have to work later

::: Anon::: says:

err yea why

Nur Azhani says:

buzz off

::: Anon::: says:

ahaha..cant you be nice ar

::: Anon::: says:

why are you such an angry person

Nur Azhani says:

it's just my nature. accept it or be gone.

Nur Azhani says:

u know, like the rest

Nur Azhani says:
Haha

::: Anon ::: says:

no! im a good friend...good friends don’t leave

::: Anon::: says:

Ahahhaha

For a friend who's known me for almost a year now, he's pretty good at reading and understanding my feelings. Hope you're not mad at me for doing this. Be-gi-tu~ ;)